Mentor Matters

Tell me and I forget, teach me and I may remember, involve me and I learn. ­– Benjamin Franklin

 The first step for every aspect of human learning is imitation. A child imitates how her parents walk, talk, laugh, play, and even fight. If there are insults flying around at home you can be sure that the child will adopt them as fast as she can. If you want to make quick progress in any field, learn to imitate.

Now, many proclaim themselves leaders in various fields but have never been mentored by someone that has gone before them. The day Novak Djokovic lost his place as tennis world number one to Rafael Nadal, he gave Boris Becker, one-time youngest ever player to win the Wimbledon Open, a call to become his trainer. He did this because he knew that to regain his top rank in world tennis he needed someone who has been there and done that.

Mentorship is a pattern for would-be champions. A mentor should be someone who would not only show you the what but also the how to achieve what you desire to achieve. In effect, that means that he or she must be a person who has done what you are trying to do in detail. Age, gender, ethnicity, and the like, may not matter when choosing a mentor. What matters is whether or not the mentor knows his or her "onions" in that area.

In choosing a mentor, there are three things that should not be ignored. The first is prior record of the possible mentor. What has the person achieved in the field? How much learning has he in it? There are times when you learn from people that have failed in the area you want to succeed in but that does not amount to mentorship. For an effective mentor-protégé relationship, you need someone who has actually succeeded in it. At the least your mentor must be someone who may have failed in an aspect of the area but have overcome his failure enough to allow for proper mentorship.

I addition, you must understand and accept your would-be mentor’s value system. You must be bold to get answers to questions like; what does she believe? What makes him compromise? Does she understand the full purpose of why she is alive? This is important. A mentor-protégé relationship does not only transfer actions and principles but the very life of the mentor gets into the protégé.

Finally, your would-be mentor must be willing to teach. You cannot learn effectively from a secretive teacher. Your mentor must be willing to show you all that you need to learn for you to succeed.